Invited over to dinner at a friend's house.
"I was going to put bacon into this pie but then I remembered that pregnant women aren't allowed to eat bacon, so I didn't."
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On bending down to pick up a pen.
Random doctor*: "I wouldn't do that if I were you. I've heard terrible stories about pregnant women who bent over."
Me: "What - are you worried the baby might just fall out?"
RD: "I wouldn't repeat them to you. They'd scare you."
Me: "No, seriously, I'm interested."
RD: (shaking her head) "Terrifying. You wouldn't sleep at night. Awful things."
*Not O&G or GP related. A random doctor I work with.
She's from Poland.**
**Eastern Europeans have, I've discovered, a lot of interesting beliefs about pregnancy.
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A letter received from O&G to the eye department
"Dear Dr
I would be grateful for your urgent consult on this 29 year old who is 28 weeks pregnant and from Bulgaria. She has astigmatism* and has been told by her doctors in Bulgaria** this means she cannot deliver vaginally. Could you see her urgently to see if a normal delivery is safe or if we need to schedule her for a C-section?"
*(i.e. needs to wear glasses)
** See? Eastern Europeans.
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Mum: "Have you found out yet whether the baby's a boy or girl?"
Me: "No."
Mum: "You're just set on making life difficult for me, aren't you?"
Me: "Why does this make life difficult for you?"
Mum: "Well now I can't buy the baby anything."
Me: "Like what?"
Mum: (Long pause) "I just feel like it's against nature not to know."
Me: "You also told me it was against nature to have an ultrasound scan."
Mum: "Yeah but now you've had one then the least you can do is find out the sex."
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On discussing maternity leave with my (female) consultant in theatre:
Anaesthetist (male): (overhearing) Oh. Are you pregnant?
Consultant: HAHAHAHA you're such a man. Yes. Yes she is pregnant.
Me: I'm almost 8 months pregnant.
Anaesthetist: Well look the scrubs aren't very flattering and it's hard to tell, and also I don't know you very well so it's not like I'm looking at your body the whole time and anyway what am I supposed to do, say to your boss, "Er have you noticed your registrar's getting a bit fat, have you thought about talking to her about her diet and exercise regime?"
Consultant: Yeah I think you've said enough now.
Anaesthetist: I'm just saying you two are looking at me like I'm a moron and I don't think it's actually that unreasonable to not notice when someone you've been working with for the last 6 months is pregnant, you know it happens gradually.
Consultant: Yeah. Such a man.
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